Saturday, August 1, 2009

Why Katherine Jackson Needs To Reconsider Custody

As the investigation into the sudden death of Pop icon, Michael Jackson continues, Debbie Rowe, ex-wife of Jackson is determined to contest Jackson’s will regarding his decision to give his mother Katherine Jackson custody of his children.

If I were Katherine, I would back down and let Rowe have those kids for the following reasons:

  • At her age, it’s a bugger-bear to raise kids;
  • Joe is going to put those kids through hell, trying to reinvent a Jackson 5;
  • Officer, Crowley will respond to a domestic abuse call and arrest Joe for beating White kids;
  • Store merchants will call security regarding a Black woman following some rich White kids around;
  • Al Sharpton will follow her around;
  • Imitation of Life III (A New Jacksons Story) may prevail;
  • Prince Michael is likely to gradually tan himself and have multiple plastic surgeries until he begins to look like the Michael Jackson we all knew from Gary, Indiana.
  • The Octo Mom will have three more kids;
  • The State of California is likely to file for Chapter 11 if the Octo Mom has anymore kids. The State cannot afford another expense. They’re broke;
  • A civil rights suit will be slapped on The State of California for refusing to support the Octo Mom;
  • The suit will likely trigger a supreme court hearing that Justice Sotomayor will be very compassionate toward, since she believes that, “A wise Latina woman, with the richness of her experience, would more often than not reach a better conclusion than a white male who hasn't lived that life.”;
  • The media will urge President Obama to intervene and he’ll gladly try and resolve the issue over a beer;
  • And, well, The Jackson’s don’t need another reason to have the media all in their business.
Then again, if Katherine could raise nine children (Rebbie, Jackie, Tito, Jermaine, LaToya, Marlon, Michael, Randy and Janet), endure constant media hassle due to their success and still look damn good at age 79, three more kids wouldn’t hurt her. Now that’s the difference between a pop star mom and a pit-bull.

Copyright © 2009 Denrique Preudhomme
Photo: Mazur/MJ Memorial via Getty


Anonymous said...

I am rolling on the floor laughing my butt off! This is too funny. Ya'll leave my nana alone. She looks better and cooler than this old lady. I do worry about the youngest, Blanket. How old will Nana been when he reaches 18? And who will step in and take care of the young adults then. I really thought one of the ladies would accept custody, his aunts.

Rhonda McKnight said...

I'm 43 and I feel too old for my 3 yr old. 79 is up there to be raising kids. But then again there are nannies and aupairs and such for the rich mama-grands so I guess it's different.

Marc A. Medley said...

Maybe Bill Clinton and get them out!